Down really down

I do have a lot of friends. No doubt about that. But how many of them are really true? And how many of them do really care? I do go out and hang out with my friends. Go classes together or even seat and have dinner together. But to know whether their intentions being with you is true or not that I am not sure.

But at the end of all the “whoha” and busyness I still sit alone in my room and think whether I will have a friend that truly will be there for me when I’m down and even someone to talk to. Sometimes I feel so lost and the only company I have is the silence of my room.

When you seat alone you tend to think a lot. I do that a lot now days. Sometimes I will be so quiet around my friends and they will start asking me whether I am ok or not. I will just give them a smile and say I am doing fine. It’s fake alright. But I just not use sharing how I feel with people maybe I just like carrying it all with me or maybe I want to share with my friends but don’t seem to think it is necessary to share how I feel with that person. Why do I need to share how I feel when I know that they’re just going to judge me and just talk behind my back? It’s not like I’m bothered when the talk about me but it does hurt eventually.

I should just stop being emo.

My second week at university starts tomorrow. My classes are pack tomorrow. It’s gonna be a long and tiring day. I have to work really hard this semester. It is not easy to maintain my pointer and everyone seems to just be reminding me about that. I just have to buck up and don’t lose track I guess. Well, that’s about it then. I got to go peeps!