Terrified by Katharine McPhee

You by the light
Is the greatest find
In a world full wrong you're the thing that's right
Finally made it through the lonely to the other side

You said it again my heart's in motion
Every word feels like a shooting star
I'm at the edge of my emotions
Watching the shadows burning in the dark,
And I'm in love and I'm terrified.
For the first time in the last time
In my only life.

This could be good
It's already better than last
And love is worse than knowing
You're holding back
I could be all that you needed
If you let me try

You said it again my hearts in motion
Every word feels like a shooting start
I'm at the edge of my emotions
Watching the shadows burning in the dark
And I'm in love and I'm terrified
For the first time in the last time
in my only

I only said it cause i mean it
I only mean cause it's true
So don't you doubt what i've been dreaming
Cause it fills me up and holds me close
Whenever i'm without you

You said it again my hearts in motion
Every word feels like a shooting star
Watching the shadows burning in the dark
And I'm in love and I'm terrified
For the first time in the last time
In my only life

.................................................

Love this song :)

If only

If only they know..
If only you know..
I am hurting in the inside.

In moments like this

The moments, the drama, the joy. I miss them, I miss what we use to have. Things are no longer the same now. People change for some reason. Whatever it is, the memories we had will always be cherished.





As we go forth, we'll remember, all the times, we had together..

I Promise

Apapun terjadi, Kujanjikan aku ada :)

Bonkers

Research Proposal is making me go BONKERS.

Aishiteru :)

Kimita tuokukitemo, Kiminoi shuaguaratala, Shiniteruyo shiniteruyo..aishiteru..

Lib mode

Listening to : High School Rocker- Bunkface

Currently at the library. Well, I have to constantly remind myself that the reason I am here is to do my assignment. But I am blogging. When will I ever learn to focus? Hopefully this would be one of the last time I HAVE TO STOP PROCRASTINATING. I feel awfully guilty for not doing my assignment. I have started but haven’t completed. I have one assignment in Leadership class. We are required to do an essay about 15- 25 pages, presentation is next week as well. I also have to hand in a proposal next week Monday! Oh ya! Its already Friday today, thus, I have only 3 days to complete my work. I am freaking out, but work still progress. Never know when I will learn my lesson.Planned to go for PC Fair with Juer and Ru but had to cancelled it, feel so bad but I got to put my priorities right. I wish I could go though. Haih.

Got to go then. Wanna work on my assignment.

Your truly, is sick and tired of everything..oh gosh, i sound emo.

Empty

Warning. Emo post coming up. I am just not me anymore. I don’t know what the hell I am doing. I am just lost in this whole thing. I never want to be there. I don’t know what is wrong with me. Am I too tired? Stressed? Or am I just giving up on life. I don’t know. I shouldn’t be emotional like this. It isn’t good for me or the people around me. It’s not that I choose to be this way. Sometimes people depend on me too much, when you guys are going to see that I am imperfect as well. I don’t know how to do things as well. I am clumsy and might not be the perfect to help you out. I will do my best but I can’t guarantee 100% that everything will go on well.

I have never asked anything more or anything less. All I ever wanted is just your friendship. I don’t want to trouble you and be a burden. So, I am sorry if sometimes I don’t want to talk about my problems to you because I don’t want to be judge. I don’t want you to think that I depend too much on you. I don’t want to be seen as a weak person. Sometimes I just don’t have the courage to tell you how I really feel because I am afraid I might hurt you. I don’t want you to feel that I am neglecting you. I am sorry if you feel that way dear friend. I can never be that perfect friend for you but I am happy you are that perfect friend for me.

I would also like to apologize to all my friends, if I ever did anything wrong. I might have said or did something wrong without realizing or sometimes on purpose. I can never please all of you but I hope I can be a better person. I am still learning and I am not perfect. Sorry if I am not good enough to be your friend. I’ll try my best to be a friend but I fail sometimes so what else can I do. I am just feeling empty now.

Meaningless

Not that important anymore in certain people's life.
I was the one who was excited, over reacted, and over did things.
Now, I got to deal and face the consequences.
I got to be strong.
I know I can do it.
I must.

Sleepy Thursday- Classes were just ok. Nothing to brag about.

FINALLY, there is water supply back in college once again. So, now I can have a nice and long shower :) Refreshing indeed. I got to go before there is shortage of water supply, since everyone wants to wash, bathe and do necessary stuff they need to do with the water supply.

Yours truly, got to bathe and wash clothes as well.

Adios then.

A new start?

Tired and Moody
Bad hair day today.
Too many things on my mind, and yeah I hope things will get better.
I miss the times and moments.
Why am I behaving this way?
Paranoid perhaps?
Whatever ever la.

So far So GOOD.

Finals are around the corner. I am going to finish my second year second semester in UM. Time flies doesn’t it. I am having my study break now but I can’t go back because I have still got one more project under me to think about. I know some of you guys might think what the hell? Got project some more although its study break. Well, whether I like it or not I got to my best for both my studies and this project.

What project am I talking about?

It is our Za’ba Residential College International Project. Every year the Board of Directors in our college will visit or go to a foreign country to learn about their culture and also visit their University there.

This year, Plan A was to go to Australia – Failed because due to some unforeseen circumstances.

Plan B- Universitas Nasional Jakarta, Indonesia.

Therefore, I was chosen to be the Project Director. It is definitely not easy as I have to foresee the ongoing planning of this whole project and I am certainly multitasking.

My secretary Izzah Yusof is certainly doing a great job helping me with all the letters and proposals. I thank God for people like Chung and Eda also for their efficiency in completing every task I gave them. Shahril, my President for always supporting what I do and for all his unending opinions. John, who contacted UNAS and not forgetting the rest of the team.

I have already been in contact with UNAS and everything seems to be going according to plan. Tomorrow all of us will be going to the Imigresen to do our passport.
Oh ya, we will be there from the 17 May-23 May 2010. One week in Indonesia should be more than enough. Looking forward for this trip and this will be yours truly first trip overseas.

Will update my blog as frequent as I can.

Exam Mode

Poetry Exam. Blah!

I’m so disappointed with myself. Need I say more?

I can never be good enough. My hope of trying to get a better pointer this semester seems to be so vague. I tried so hard I did. Hopefully, I’ll do better for my next paper.

Critical Thinking- 11 November

Well it was so so.. Easy, Average, and Difficult. Confusing at times.

Next paper, Teaching Poetry. But I'm totally worried about my Psychology paper.

3 More papers and I'll taste pure pleasure and freedom.

Deep Inside..

I look back and I see no one was there for me or with me.

I wonder was I walking alone all this while. Or did they just leave?

This lonely soul wanders.

In the midst of loneliness.

I know I am all alone.

Life

Lots of downs these days then ups.

I am slacking, I know I am.

I am at the edge, might just fall off or let go anytime.

I shouldn't be so negative but things that are happening to me doesn't seem to be helping me at all.

I did great/good for my presentation earlier, according to my friends.

Hopefully I will find the light at the end of the tunnel.

Missing the live I used to live as a form 6 student.

If only i could turn back time.

Someone told me that I'm going to be 21 already so I got to be rational and face situations wisely.

Missing Dad N Mum.

ThInKInG

Do u actually care?

i HOPE so

But I DONT think you DO.

Bad Day GOne GooD

I had one of the worst days of my life today.
Terrible headache,
I think I'm not getting enough sleep. But i just dont have enough time, if i sleep early at night.
Anyway, THANK God i only had two classes today.
After class, wanted to go back to college....but....i went for prayer meeting first.
Prayer meeting with Leslie, Vily, and Zhong Weng.
I was kind of suffering so didnt layan them that much, felt kind of bad though.
Sorry guys, my sincere apology.
Well, after prayer meeting i walked back to college all on my own, coz they wanted to grab lunch at the faculty itself.
As i was walking back, passing Language and Linguistics Faculty, a car passed by me, and mystery man was in there. Wah, i was so excited. Gosh, and he waved at me first, then obviously i waved back. That's about it. You guys might think Im crazy, getting excited just because of a wave, but hey! i dont care =) coz me like him! I have tonnes of assignment to do. Got to go!

missing mummy and daddy

ChAmPions..Congrats

I went for my juniors dance competition today, was held and organized by 4th residential college.

They did a great job and won 2nd place..

Congratulations!

7th college rocks.

the dancers, all 1st year students

TenSiOn + RunSing

omg! one problem to another, why must i be facing this today, of all days in my life! super lame! i have so many assignments yet im caught up in the middle of this. just feeling so frustrated, why did i do to this deserve all this, for the past whole year i have been giving my all for this club then now, u all act like i dont even exist? u know what i dont give a damn already. totally annoyed and i guess i will move on from today onwards. what u want to do, u guys decide, i will concentrate on other college stuff that i am involve in.

I dont care anymore i just dont!

Dont come finding me when u all need me.

Because at that time, I aint helping!

U guys are playing with my emotions.

Stop talking behind my back as well, because i know u are. Go find some other topics or just go and studylah if u have all the time in the world. Like the peribahasa jangan jaga tepi kain orang...

I may look vurnerable but i am strong, i went to many hardships in life to stop what i am doing now.

I aint quitting if u think i am.

WELL, although i am EMO~ing right now, i still feel so disappointed.

Oh GOSH! cant wait for year end sem break! Well, at least the raya holidays...

CraViNg4cOOkiEs

It 4.30am i should be sleeping but here i am thinking about cookies!

i LOVE them

Chocolates and Assignments

Thanks to Shahril, who is my college President we got to eat chocolates today. He bought them from Langkawi and shared with all of us. Those who miss the party, too bad la.

I was not feeling very well today. I had headache in the afternoon, after class i came back and slept. I slept around 4.30pm and got up at almost 8.

I have no idea why am i getting this headaches.

I got up had dinner and started working on my assignment.

Thank God i manage to finish it.

~phheww~

I still have another three pending assignments.

1. Writing in ESL classroom

2. Reading in ESL classroom

3. Poetry V1

Two pending discussions.

1. Education Phsycology Paper

2. Thinking and Communication Skills

Tomorrow 26/8

I have to attend "Majlis Perasmian Festival Kemerdekaan (FESKEM)

Thursday 27/8

Meeting with the JKP college

Friday 28/8

Watikah Perlantikan peringkat HEP (Universiti)

Hopefully everything goes on smoothly.

I have to get some sleep now.

Goodnight and golden dreams everyone.